Happy, Who are You?

The day is almost over. I showed up to all the places I was supposed to, did the things I was required to. I've arranged my desk for myself so that I'll have what I need to do what I need to do.

I've decided to have a love affair with a woman. I'll call her.... Rose. Rose and I are going to become reacquainted. We've lost touch, gone our separate ways. I even went as far as sending myself a gift for Mother's Day. I ordered my favorite fragrant candles. I'll burn them ever so brightly for my own enjoyment.

I heard a quote the other day: 'the greatest gift we can give our children is the gift of our own happiness'. Woweee. The explanation was that no kid wants to see their parents unhappy. They want to answer, 'Oh, yes, my mom IS/WAS happy!' Not to say I abandon all responsibility and do what I want. But, I have to admit that, when I witnessed either of my parents being happy, it made me happy, too. Seeing anyone that I love, happy, is a treat. I haven't quite gotten to the point of doing this happiness thing just for me, but, baby steps.

The anniversary is approaching. It's next Friday. I will concentrate this year, on me. My life didn't end on May 4th. His did. And, I decided it's time to stop dying for him, just to be 'with him', in a way. I'm alive and thank god, well. Strong. I'm actually strong.

God is good. He's been hanging in there, as usual, waiting for me to come around. And, here I am.