Love kind of stinks

My nephew just broke it off with his girlfriend. They had planned to marry. I have to say that I'm so relieved. You know the feeling you get when you are with someone, and they are a million miles away? I never felt like he was 'there' when he was there. Love stinks.



What is love? Man, it's a big pain in the butt. I watched Oprah the other night when she interviewed the woman who blasted her preacher husband with a RIFLE. She was about as tall as a rifle and somehow, cocked that sucker and blasted him. I think Oprah was on to her, too. She was trying to figure out how this woman just kind of decided, 'oh, I'll shoot him with the rifle that is as big as me' and did it. Uh uh. No, I think she had been a-plannin it for a long-ass time. And, she'd finally gotten the nerve to do it. But, I digress...



Love will make you do some weird stuff...



My 13 year old announced to us the other night that the guy that had been calling everynight had 'asked her out'. I said, 'where are you going?' and, of course, she laughed as did my son, 'Nowhere, mom, it's not like THAT. It means we are boyfriend and girlfriend'. My response, 'why not just say that' was met with deaf ears.



She walked taller the short history of this affair. She was eager to get to school and see him. Jr. High love affairs. How horrible those were! But, today, the little shit sent his henchman (two chicks) to tell her he wanted to break it off. I tell ya, I wanted to break HIS off, after I heard that he had hurt my baby. Asshole. But, she took it well.



Love. Love does stink. I can't imagine being 'in love'. I think when people are 'in love' they are kind of lost from the rest of civilization, like they have landed on an island and are stuck there. I remember being 'in love'. I couldn't wait to see Gordon. Every moment of the day I spent being so happy about him. And, we were just drunk with love. Kind of gross when I think of it, but, I think I recall it felt really good at the time.



But then, that wears off. And, I was ok with that. We settled into the 'we love one another' phase. More mature, yeah, that's it. I never dreamed that I had a choice though. I felt like my destiny was being with him. I didn't feel like I had a choice and more importantly, that I could choose. Hmmm.... interesting. I suppose that is the 'gift' I've been given from being a widow now for 3 and a half years. I have a choice. I have a choice. I'll continue to hear that mantra when someday I go on an awkward date.



Speaking of awkward; I had the job interview. Didn't feel it. Can't describe it. I don't think they felt it for me, and vice versa. I mean, it went ok, but, it just didn't feel good. That's ok, it's over now.

Well, hopefully I can go home soon. Another day, another dollar.